The first time I tried meditating, it didn't go as well as I had hoped. After taking a deep breath, closing my eyes, and focusing on my breath, I was startled by the sound of a bird chirping. When I opened my eyes to see where the noise came from, there it was: a real live bird perched on the windowsill not far from me. It just stared at me with its beady little eyes until I closed mine again. Then I got distracted by the feeling of something tickling my nose. I tried to ignore it but eventually reached up with one hand to brush away whatever it was that had decided to annoy me right then and there. Then there were all those thoughts that kept popping up in my brain about how hungry I was for lunch and whether or not that thing would just come off if I pulled really hard (I'm referring to an imaginary hair). My mind wandered so far from itself that when I finally gave up and opened my eyes again, an hour had gone by without me noticing (and yes: it's true about the imaginary hair). In hindsight, though, this is exactly what meditation is supposed to do for you—it helps you learn how to focus more fully on things like your breath so that your mind has less room for other stuff like random thoughts about lunch or whatever else happens to occur during your day-to-day life.
Find a comfortable position.
Let's get started!
Find a comfortable position. You can sit cross-legged on the floor, sit on a chair, or lie down on your back or side. If you have any discomfort in any of these positions, try another one until you find one that is comfortable.
Close your eyes and focus on your breath.
The most important part of meditation is your breath. Most people breathe shallowly, about 4 to 6 breaths per minute. This can be improved through relaxation techniques, but even then it’s common for people to breathe at 10 breaths per minute or less during meditation. To begin with, try focusing on inhaling and exhaling deeply through the nose for 5 minutes and then count each breath from 1-to 10 in your mind as you breathe in and out. As you get used to this type of breathing, try counting from 1-to 20 or keeping track of one long exhale followed by one short inhale for every number in your mind before going back down again (1 – 10).
Accept that your mind will wander.
Expect your mind to wander. It's normal and natural for the mind to be distracted during meditation, especially when you're new at it. Don't worry too much about this; just accept that your mind will wander, and then gently bring it back to focus on your breath. If you notice yourself getting frustrated or angry with yourself for being distracted, remember that nothing is wrong with who you are—these feelings are part of being human!
You may also find that when you sit down to meditate, all kinds of thoughts come into your head: "I need a haircut," "Maybe I should get a new smartphone," or even "How did I get here?" This can happen even if you're an experienced meditator—the key is not judging yourself for these thoughts but simply acknowledging them and then letting them go. As soon as one thought leaves your headspace, another one will take its place—and sometimes those new thoughts could lead back into more moments of mindfulness than anything else!
Stop judging every little thing about yourself.
Judging is a normal part of the human experience. It's how we make sense of the world, but it's not necessarily a good way to do so. We all judge things and people, ourselves included. This can be difficult to recognize because judging comes from deep within your psyche and feels like an innate truth rather than something you're aware of doing. If you've ever felt insecure about anything or worried that someone doesn't like you or think highly enough of your work, these are examples of judgement—you've judged yourself as unworthy or others as unkind for no apparent reason other than what seems true in your mind.
One way to cut down on this type of thinking is by distinguishing between judgments based on fact (e.g., "this restaurant has good food") versus judgments based solely on feelings (e.g., "this restaurant must have given me food poisoning"). The latter is much harder to verify and may cause unnecessary stress in everyday life if left unchecked!
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Consider trying meditation apps, like Headspace and Calm.
For those of you who don't know how to meditate, or haven't done it before, an app can be a great way to start. It can help you learn the basics and get you into a regular routine. They also have a built-in community where people are working on similar goals as you and share their experiences.
I personally use Headspace, which offers a free 10-day trial and then charges $7.99/month for their premium subscription (which includes guided meditations). There are other options out there too like Calm ($12.99/month) or even free apps like Insight Timer or Omvana (both have advertisements but no paid subscriptions).
Remember: there's no right or wrong way to meditate, and you can practice anywhere at any time!
You can practice meditation in the morning or at night, so it's easy to fit into your schedule.
When you do it is up to you!
Just remember: there’s no right or wrong way to meditate, and you can practice anywhere at any time!
Now you know how to meditate! You might have felt like a meditation master after your first time, but don't worry if it didn't go as well as you'd hoped. Meditation is about letting go and accepting whatever comes, which is why we encourage you to accept that your mind will wander and stop judging yourself so much. Remember: there's no right or wrong way to meditate, and you can practice anywhere
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